Tuesday night found me in an unusual place: surrounded by passionate conservatives gathered to cheer on the Republican presidential candidate at a debate watch. 

Evan Bochetto, son of my friend and legendary attorney George Bochetto and a member of the Philadelphia Young Republicans, had reached out a few days earlier to invite me to an event held at Hotel Monaco in Society Hill, a few hundred yards from the site of the presidential debate. When I arrived, I was ushered into a standing room only venue packed with Gen Z and Millennial voters enjoying food, drinks and eager to view the debate in two large television screens that had been set up in the hotel’s Lafayette Room. It was wonderful to reconnect with George, Joe Gale and his brother Sean, and Jeff Bartos, whom I met when they were campaigning during the last election cycle.  It was a room packed with political VIPs.

But even more surprising than the number of attendees which I would put at close to 500 was the composition of the crowd: this 62-year-old columnist was by far one of the oldest women in the room. The vast majority of the female attendees were about half my age.

And that’s when I realized the true purpose of my visit: find out what it was like to be a young conservative woman in the city of Philadelphia where Democrats outnumber Republicans seven to one at last count in voter registration.

I spent a good amount of the evening speaking to three young women who, not unsurprisingly, asked me to keep their identities anonymous. For context, these were highly educated and accomplished professional women who had carved out successful careers in, respectively, business, science and the law but who did not feel comfortable enough to have their names published for attribution. And so, we spoke off the record. 

It was an illuminating conversation.

“Chelsea” worked for a production company, and assured me that if she were identified by her employer as a Trump voter, her continued employment would be in jeopardy. She lamented the fact that in the city where the First Amendment had been written she felt uncomfortable expressing her support for her chosen political candidate, but that she could not risk “coming out,” so to speak, as MAGA. 

In the safe space of the Lafayette Room, however, she was even able to sport a MAGA cap. Chelsea’s primary concern was the economy, as well as free speech issues, a poignant observation given her request to remain anonymous. When I explained to her that I’d been let go from the Philadelphia Inquirer after seventeen years because of my increasing unwillingness to sand down the edges of my conservative voice, she nodded in solidarity.

“Allyson” was an engineer and the grandchild of immigrants. I asked her what attracted her to the Young Republicans and she replied that she had always been an outspoken conservative in her family but that it was difficult to express these views outside of those familiar, limited spaces. 

She said “I try and raise issues like the economy, immigration and national security in small groups with my friends to persuade them,” noting that anything confrontational was a turn off to Democrats. She added that it was easier to deal with people one on one, instead of engaging in social media battles. Familiarity, Allyson said, was often much more persuasive than bombast, because it’s harder to be hostile to someone with whom you have a shared history.

“Shannon” and I bonded over the fact that we were both lawyers, even though she’d attended Temple like most of my family while I was a Villanova Wildcat. We also shared an interest in immigration, since Shannon was a first generation American whose parents had emigrated from the Middle East.  We talked about the unfortunate rhetoric around this hot button issue, and how both Democrats and Republicans were exploiting it for political advantage instead of looking to arrive at real solutions. I told her about my trip to the border last year made possible by Broad + Liberty and the fact that no administration was taking this problem seriously, least of all the erstwhile “Border Czar.” We weren’t particularly impressed, however, with Trump’s self-defeating rhetoric about “people eating pets.”

Beyond the professional, I wanted to find out from these young women how being a conservative in Philadelphia had impacted their personal lives, particularly their dating experiences.  To a person, they told me that they’d had real problems connecting with prospective partners not on the dating apps and in person. “Chelsea” noted with a rueful smile that she knows men who, when they check out your profile and see any mention of being a Republican or a conservative they simply “swipe left.” Allyson simply smiled and said “it’s not easy in Philadelphia.” Shannon agreed, and added that she generally tries to keep things light and apolitical during the first couple hours of a date, and makes an assessment of her partner to see whether he would be open-minded enough to continue the conversation.

I mentioned to the women that I had moved beyond the point where I self-censored, particularly on abortion and had long ago made my pro-life credentials clear publicly. This triggered a strong reaction in Allyson, whose dark eyes flashed when she said, “When they start talking about abortion, everyone knows exactly where I stand.” Message received.

And then I addressed the elephant in the room: Kamala Harris. I asked Chelsea, Allyson and Shannon how they felt about the Vice President being a woman and whether this had any impact on their vote. To a person, they stated that it was insulting to believe that women will vote for a woman simply because of her gender. As Shannon said, “It’s pandering.” This is a theme that I’ve heard from other women, not just Gen Z and millennials. When I was on an Inside Story panel a few weeks ago, the subject of the “suburban woman vote” was broached at the table, and the two women at the table, myself and Laura Manion, had to remind the male panelists that we do not vote as a monolith and that, no, abortion is not the litmus test for the majority of educated voters.

The conversation came to an end a few moments before the debate started. We exchanged cards and promises to reconnect. It’s my intention to follow up with these women in the run up to the election, because I think that they hold the key to a silent but crucial demographic: young conservative females who are overlooked in the polls because of an unwillingness to speak out, but who may very likely sway the election in favor of Donald Trump. 

Christine Flowers is an attorney and lifelong Philadelphian. @flowerlady61